Hurry up… and WAIT! Am I seriously “overdue”??

It’s been over almost 2 weeks from my last post when I thought this baby’s arrival was imminent. For much of my last trimester, I was fairly sure this boy would be early, and I definitely thought the night I last wrote about was the start of something. But alas, it was a false alarm. The pains passed, and then my due date passed, and now here I sit here at 411/2 weeks! I went from trying to hurry up and get all in order for him, to now waiting each day for his arrival.

I was a week late with Aria, and it seems all the babies in my family seem to run late (a trait that also seems to have carried over to my adulthood). I guess I shouldn’t be surprised this one is taking his time. As I’ve had time on my hands, I’ve been doing quite a bit of reading on due dates and the pressure/anxiety women feel when they fall outside of what they perceive as “normal.”

Forty weeks is what we’re all told is the term of a normal pregnancy, yet the more I read about (and experience) it, the less I like that women are given a “due date.” Perhaps a due window would be better (and less ostracizing), for in reality fewer than 5% of women actually deliver on their due date, with the majority of us giving it a go between 38 and 41 weeks. Due dates are indeed “guesstimates,” and all of our bodies are being completely different, need to be considered on an individual basis. In fact, new research shows that pregnancy length varies naturally up to 5 weeks.  In Europe, they even changed “full term” to 41 weeks to discourage women from getting frantic, and to also decrease the number of inductions happening. So, in reality, carrying past 41 weeks is still very normal and healthy.

Of course, after 41weeks most practitioners give extra care and attention, and  a few days ago I had to go in for a biophysical sonogram to make sure baby was all good. He was. Happy as can be in what seems my (all too) comfortable womb, scoring a “10 out of 10” on all their criteria. This of course, gives me extra ease, but, still, knowing that most doctors don’t let women go past 42 weeks does add a little undue pressure.

That being said, I’ve also been reading up on all the wives tales and natural ways to bring on labor. I’ve eaten quite a few curries, taken hot baths, walked miles and miles (thank you fall foliage for the pretty backdrop), and didn’t even curse the bumpy dirt roads after reading they also (strangely) have been thought to help. I decided against the castor oil and other more extreme measures, as the side effects are totally not worth it at this stage. As I move closer to 42 weeks, I’ll likely consider acupuncture or a membrane sweep, but for now though, I am just trusting this boy will come when he’s ready.

Admittedly, I’m a bit of a control freak, and not so good at being in limbo, but some things can’t be rushed. This boy is showing me who’s boss already, and perhaps a greater lesson of letting go of expectation/control is being reiterated to me (again!).  I’m down to twice weekly appointments with my doctor and every day seems to revolve around the impending birth, but I’m trying not to let it be the end all and be all of each day. No body needs that kind of pressure. Instead, I’m trying to remind myself that my body knows what it’s doing, and the more I just let it do it’s thing and let nature take it’s course, the better we all will be

So yes, I’m still pregnant. Not overdue though. I’d rather say, we’re just right… for us.

The Homestretch: Am I ready? When’s it gonna happen? Give me a sign!

We’re in the homestretch! I’m due Monday and have been feeling like this kid could come any time. Two nights ago, I had crazy new cramps down my inner thighs and some shortness of breath, and I thought for sure both were a sign that labor was going to start sooner than later. But, alas, 2 days later he’s still cooking.

Two days ago: Wednesday night, October 21 9:30pm

I’ve been trying to remember how I felt (and if I had any clear signs) in the days leading up to Aria’s birth. I can recollect feeling different, but, then again, she was a week late so every day that passed I was anticipating her. The night before she was born, I had started getting contractions at 10pm, and it all rolled very easily from there (she was born the next morning), but I don’t remember the signs before that all started. I now wish I had written down everything I felt in the days leading up.

I’m thinking this boy will arrive in the next few days (I’ve been chatting with him for a while to come this weekend, or on his due date of Monday, as it would be most convenient for me), but even though I feel like he might, I also have no idea. I’ve been asking friends and googling some common signs that labor is coming soon, but bottom line is anything can happen at any time.

Nonetheless, if it’s any help to any expectant moms out there, here’s what’s going on with me right now.

Pressure & cramps: The crazy leg cramps I had the other night were not the common charley horses I felt all through this pregnancy. Instead, they were intense sharp pains down my inner thigh (perhaps he’s hitting a nerve?), that took my breath away. I’ve had them here and there since, but the other night they were hitting one after the other, so it had me thinking labor was definitely on it’s way to meet me.

I’ve also felt more pressure and bearing down in my pelvis. Now it could just be that the bigger he gets, the more I feel. After all, he’s gotta be a pretty good size by now, and is definitely in position. They say in the last day your baby “drops,” but this boy has been head down and ready to go for months. Lately though, ANY little move he makes, I FEEL.

I also sense a build up of what feels like a fluid pressure at times. It’s hard to describe, but almost like my water could break at any moment. With Aria, it didn’t break until I was in the hospital, and, since I experienced that, I can kinda recollect the feeling just before, which is this build up/pressure feeling I’ve had the last few days. But, nothing popping just yet, so I guess for now I’m good.

Nesting: I’ve been scurrying around trying to get things in order the last few days. Some say this burst of energy and intense “nesting” often comes days before labor sets in, but I still wonder if it’s just my procrastinating nature, and the fact that now I know it’s crunch time, that I’m finally getting shit together for this boy. It’s so funny, because for Aria I was setting up a room and making sure all was as it should be months in advance, and this poor baby gets things pulled out of the attic and dusted off last minute.

Emotional: I’ve definitely been more emotional as of late. I found myself crying during CNN the other night. Granted it was a Lisa Ling documentary that was a bit tender, but never would have brought my pre-pregnant self to tears. I’m sure it’s all these crazy hormones, and perhaps the anticipation of the unknown that’s got me a bit off kilter. Many woman say they’re more crabby also leading up. Of course, I wouldn’t know anything about that.

Speaking of being off, when I was thinking we might be close the other night, I got a little jittery because I was home alone and thought, “Is this whole thing making me nervous?” (As clearly shown in picture above!) Nerves aren’t common for me, but the reality that all was about to change in life (and hey, that I could be pushing out a kid that night), did put me a bit on edge. I think it’s totally natural for women (and dads to be for that matter) to feel that way. I guess I just didn’t expect it to come over me since this my second go-around, but, hey, life IS about to change… BIG time!

This morning. Still in there!

No matter, what the signs or symptoms, I’m thankful that in the end I know that I am ready. We never have all set, and the unknown is scary, but having had Aria and knowing the incredible impact she has had on my life reassures me. Before her, I had no idea how deep and wide and unconditional love could be. Granted, with her it was not this immediate gush of love upon delivery like you see in movies, but it has been a steady and increasingly heavy hold on my heart. A love that has grown to be more immense than I could have ever imagined. This, and even the swell of my heart as I just caught sight of the banner on this page and her sweet newborn face, totally put me at ease and crush any and anxiety I might feel about number two. In fact, it only makes me look forward to meeting him, and starting another new adventure. So, we’re in the homestretch. Bring it on.